Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Panties = found
Randomize
