We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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