Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize