did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize