I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
tell me about the fingering
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