God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
