the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I don't deserve a penis
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
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