I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
