Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize