yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize