The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize
