Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
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