Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
