Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Randomize
