when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I'm bleeding and have questions
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize