OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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