This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
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