So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
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