He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize