Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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