whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
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