some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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