i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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