I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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