Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
