I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
