what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
