Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
