I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
