So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
