He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
