im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
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