So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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