At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize