She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
