Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
