I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
