I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
