Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
