If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize