im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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