...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
