at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
