No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
