I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
