He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
