You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
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