Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
