This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
