So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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